My 20 Year High School Reunion–To Go or Not To Go? THAT is the Question

Heather Mooney (Janeane Garafalo) in Romy & Michele’s High School Reunion

Today is a bit different of a topic. High school. Oh…dear…GOD. My twenty year reunion is looming coming up and I am really torn whether or not to attend. Like many people, high school was really difficult. I was painfully shy and awkward and made up for my profound insecurity by talking non-stop. If you can’t dazzle with brilliance, baffle with…

I didn’t make friends, I took hostages.

Not to mention that my reunion is…well, complicated. See, I don’t even really know which reunion to attend. I was on the 5 year plan. I switched schools eleven times and five of those changes were in high school. My parents decided to move us to Florida in the middle of my sophomore year, which meant in Florida, I got the joy of doing my sophomore year…again.

Florida was nice to me. Even though I had to repeat 10th grade, they at least let me take honors classes. I took College Literature, Honors Marine Biology, only when I transferred back to Southwest in Fort Worth?

None of it counted.

Not even my Health and Wellness class.

The Fort Worth Codependent School District called it Health & Fitness, and, even though Florida’s Health & Wellness was taught from the exact SAME book, I got to retake the class…AGAIN. I took Health THREE times, all because each school called it something different and it was required that I not be confused where babies came from.

I hold a special kind of hate for school administrators.

Thus, instead of graduating in 1992 in a class of people I actually knew and whom I had gone to school with in my earlier years before my parents decided to move around more that Romany Gypsies, I graduated in 1993. Thus, technically I really shouldn’t be attending my 20 year reunion until NEXT year, but all the people I know are in the reunion THIS year. So, I don’t even think I am on the list of graduates for 1992. I keep picturing this humiliating scenario where they reenact crossing the stage, only I’m not on the list of those graduating.

*head desk*

Sort of like this dream I’ve had for the last 20 years where I am a successful doctor, lawyer, author and my high school counselor shows to tell me that there was a mistake. I never really graduated high school so my college degree is null and void and I am slotted to return to high school…and begin again at the tenth grade.

Because apparently I didn’t repeat that grade enough in the 90s.

The upside to all of this high school drama is that it made me funny. My dear friend and business partner Ingrid Schaffenburg tells me that humor is birthed from pain which explains why I am freaking HYSTERICAL. Those years were dreadful, but they taught me to never give up. Many people would have never finished school after being held back so many times.

But you know what? I learned to have rhino skin and not take myself so darn seriously and those are qualities that have helped me become a successful author. I learned that, when things get bad, we only have two choices—laugh or cry. I’ll take laughing any day of the week. I learned to just keep pressing. Keep moving forward. Setbacks are only temporary stops if we just keep moving forward.

Failure can be a tombstone or a stepping stone; the choice is ours.

Southwest was full of some really wonderful people that I wish I’d known better. No one was ever particularly mean to me (that was another high school), but I did watch most people from afar, envious of their friendships. I always felt like an outsider looking in.

At Southwest I just coasted along being an annoying overachiever who tried too hard.  I didn’t make a lot of close friends because I was so tired of saying good-bye. Every move had meant letting go of people I loved, so by the time I finally lighted on a school I kept everyone at a distance.

So after all of this, I am really on the fence about whether or not to go. I don’t really fit. Technically speaking I am actually crashing the 92 reunion, since I should attend the 93 reunion. I find life has a sick sense of humor. The person who hated high school gets to go to TWO reunions.

*passes out*

I keep waffling back and forth. I might get to finally make friends with the people I was too afraid to talk to back then, and that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. And then there is this other vision I get of spending a couple hundred bucks to just stand in a corner blabbing to one of the caterers.

So what are your thoughts? Should I go or not go? I am kind of terrified, but I just spent Wednesday’s blog kicking you guys out of the comfort zone and I try to take my own advice. But at least I’m honest when I tell you that I am a total chicken so I need your help before making this decision. This is one advantage to blogging :D. You can use your followers for free therapy feedback.What was your high school reunion experience? Good times? Biggest mistake EVER? Share your high school hell stories!

I’m actually happy I graduated from Southwest, because this could have totally been me had I graduated from another high school that shall not be mentioned by name…

I love hearing from you!

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I will pick a winner every week for a critique of your first five pages. At the end of May I will pick a winner for the grand prize. A free critique from me on the first 15 pages of your novel. Good luck!

Last week’s winner of a 5 page critique is Marvin Mayer.  Please send your 1250 word Word document to authorkristen.lamb at gmail dot com.

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  1. #1 by Gerri Brousseau on May 25, 2012 - 10:49 am

    Success is revenge. I say go.

  2. #2 by Pamela Skjolsvik (@pamelaskjolsvik) on May 25, 2012 - 10:50 am

    I say go. If anything, you’ll get a good story out of it. And caterers are people too:)

  3. #3 by Laurie on May 25, 2012 - 10:51 am

    I can see kicking yourself out of your comfort zone for writing or things you actually LIKE and WANT to do…but this? No. Wouldn’t even consider it. Bet you can guess how I feel about high school!

  4. #4 by Jodie Renner on May 25, 2012 - 10:52 am

    I say move ahead, not backwards! People want you to still be like you were then, so they can pigeon-hole you. Don’t give old classmates any power they don’t deserve. You’ve come a long way, baby! Onward! :-)

  5. #5 by Good Day, Reg People (@GDRPempress) on May 25, 2012 - 10:54 am

    What doesn’t kill us makes us funnier…which is why I can’t believe someone hasn’t offered me my own Comedy Central Special yet.

    xo

  6. #6 by lizardqueen on May 25, 2012 - 10:54 am

    Absolutely crash the ’92 reunion, since you’ll hopefully know more folks there. If it all crashes and burns, you’ll have more writing material. ;-)

    • #7 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 25, 2012 - 10:55 am

      Well I can crash the 92′ reunion and then if I go down in flames I can learn and try again at the 93 reunion.

      God, this is a book.

  7. #8 by Tiffany A White on May 25, 2012 - 10:55 am

    GOOOOOO!!! :)

  8. #9 by Kenn Ashcraft on May 25, 2012 - 10:56 am

    Great stuff! Your blog is the bomb–I learn something new every time I read it.

  9. #10 by Catherine Johnson on May 25, 2012 - 10:57 am

    Oh you have to go and take a bazillion businees cards. Wait until they ask you what you do now, what fun!

  10. #11 by Jody Robbins on May 25, 2012 - 10:58 am

    You have to go! 20-year reunions are the best. All the former hotties now look like regular folks (either fat, bald or heavily injected in the creepy way). At the 10-year reunion everyone still has something to prove. Add another 10 years and they’re just happy to get out of the house. I found most egos were checked at the door at my 20-year reunion and those that weren’t, were ridiculed.

  11. #12 by S. J. Bickford on May 25, 2012 - 10:59 am

    Go! I struggled with the entire ‘should I go?’ question on my high school reunion, too. I based my decision to go on the simple fact that I’d rather regret going than regret not going. I never regretted my decision to go. GO!

  12. #13 by Kendra on May 25, 2012 - 10:59 am

    Having been to both my 10 and 20-year reunions, my suggestion is to make contact with the people you most want to see, and meet them for a happy hour/brunch outside the reunion. My reunions were so-so, but the informal gatherings rocked. More time to catch up, more relaxed…just better in general.

  13. #14 by Jodie Renner on May 25, 2012 - 11:00 am

    (Not sure why my photo didn’t show up – I’m not trying to be anonymous! LOL)

    • #15 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 25, 2012 - 11:07 am

      My gravatar was ticking me off all last week. I couldn’t get it to show my picture. I finally fixed it this week totally by accident. I just kept pushing buttons.

      I be a technology expert :P

  14. #16 by Melinda VanLone on May 25, 2012 - 11:00 am

    I would never attend any reunion of my high school. I didn’t much like the place, or the people in it. I’m pretty sure they didn’t like me either, so no need to go see what they are up to now. I went with my husband to his reunion and it was the most awkward thing ever. The people he wanted to see we already keep in touch with. The others? Didn’t remember him. All I really learned from the experience was you can’t go back. It’s not the same. That said, if you liked high school and are hoping to see people…go to the one with the people you want to see. Heck, go to both. Who says you can’t? Who cares if you are on “the list.” There were plenty who weren’t from the same year as my husband there at the reunion. There were also a few from a different high school entirely. Eh, it’s a party! The more the merrier!

  15. #17 by LauraDrake on May 25, 2012 - 11:01 am

    Oh my gosh, Kristen, I have that same dream, that it turns out I didn’t graduate HS after all, and I’m back (usually sans shirt) to retake math. And that day is a test I knew nothing about. Afraid to know what that says about me.

    I went back for my 20th reunion – first time in the state since I bailed. Take it from me, don’t do it.
    You get this picture in your head that they’ve all matured, and you can sit and laugh about it all with a glass of zin . . . Not so much. Oh yeah, they’re older, but some made a career out of NOT growing up.

    It WAS satisfying, measuring the cheerleaders backsides against mine, but overall, I walked away remembering why I didn’t hang out with them in the first place! Nothing good to be gained, trust me.

    • #18 by Lynn Kelley on May 25, 2012 - 1:07 pm

      I’m so glad to hear that I’m not the only one who has that dream, too, finding out I never graduated high school. In those dreams, it’s always algebra that I supposedly didn’t pass. And I’m at a new school, trying to find my classes, but I can’t remember my schedule, can’t remember where my locker is or the combination, and can’t find my books! Argh! I hate that dream! Very unsettling! I didn’t start having it until about seven years ago when I stopped working as court reporter, due to health issues. I think that maybe deep down I feel like I’m not longer a professional and don’t even have a legit HS diploma! Weird, weird, weird! Huh?

  16. #19 by Paul Anthony Shortt (@PAShortt) on May 25, 2012 - 11:02 am

    Hell yeah you should go! If only to strut your bad self around and be all “Look at me, I rock!”

    • #20 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 25, 2012 - 11:08 am

      LOL. Yes, I am still a dork but at least now I bear my geek card with pride. You hear that high school?

      I LIKED Dungeons and Dragons :P.

  17. #22 by Sandra Warren on May 25, 2012 - 11:03 am

    I’m with Pamela, go. You never know what may come of it. You may just be surprised at the folks who do remember you, admired you and aren’t surprised at your success. And who knows, the wife or husband of one of your classmates might be the person connected to THE editor or publisher you’ve been trying to reach. (Remember that 6 degrees of separation thing?) And, like Pamela said, “you’ll get a good story out of it.”

  18. #23 by newsofthetimes on May 25, 2012 - 11:03 am

    I say go! Everyone has changed in 20 years and it is amazing to see – the men look fatter and balder, the women look fabulous, and no one cares anymore what anyone looks like! Dive in and enjoy every moment! And then write about it after! :-)

  19. #24 by lizardqueen on May 25, 2012 - 11:07 am

    Hey, I was an unaccompanied wall-flower at my 20th (debated on going, was an hour late) until a small posse of geek friends found me. Then we spent the whole night laughing at drunk former cheerleader and jocks, trying to stay on the mechanical bull (YES — there was a mechanical bull at the reunion. Hello, North Texas!). Huh — there’s a story there. ;-)

  20. #25 by Marcy Kennedy on May 25, 2012 - 11:07 am

    I vote go. The worst that could happen is that you do spend your time in the corner talking to the caterer, and odds are that won’t be what happens. But it would be much worse to not go and then spend the next 20 years wondering if you should have.

    My high school doesn’t do reunions, which I find sad. I’d love to go and see what all those people I used to know have become. Yes, I was the geeky, painfully shy brainiac who never had a date, but now I’m a happily married, still geeky, somewhat confident introvert. And I’m good with that :)

  21. #26 by lindseyjparsons on May 25, 2012 - 11:08 am

    I have just been to my 30 year school reunion, (I can’t believe it could possibly be 30 years since I left school!) I didn’t have many close friends at school as I found it difficult to mix, I wasn’t good at conversation and really just preferred to sit quietly in the corner. I luckily did have a couple of friends to go with though who like me were ‘the quiet ones’. I was very apprehensive about going, but it was fine, quite a few other people spoke to me and I have a some new friends on FB now!
    It wasn’t the greatest night of my life, but it was ok and we had a good time.
    So I say go what’s the worst that could happen?

  22. #27 by Dave Meej on May 25, 2012 - 11:08 am

    I better see you there. Who cares if you didn’t actually graduate until the next year? Funny talk about being stuck in the corner with the caterer. If you do make it, I will share with you the various random dreams I’ve had about this event. I had one just this morning; it was the opposite of fun. If nothing else, we can make fun of the people who got fat and bald! ;)

    • #28 by Dave Meej on May 25, 2012 - 11:11 am

      You would think the one thing I would not allow my phone to misspelled is my name. That’s Dave Meek arg.

    • #29 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 25, 2012 - 11:13 am

      Well, if you will be there then I have to go. I just didn’t feel really a part of the experience, so that just added to the insecurity.

  23. #30 by S. J. Maylee on May 25, 2012 - 11:11 am

    For sure you should go, they would totally miss out if you didn’t show and we’d miss out on some good stories :) Most important, I think you’d have a fabulous time.

  24. #31 by Arlee Bird on May 25, 2012 - 11:12 am

    I was pretty much a nondescript entity in high school. They weren’t the worst years of my life, but they weren’t the most exciting by any means. There was no great love lost when I graduated. I did go to my 25th reunion and had a ball. It was kind of cool to meet up with the old kids that I hadn’t seen since those days and everyone was pretty nice. Probably less than half of the graduating class showed up, but I did get to visit with a few old friends. Nobody got a 40th reunion together when that time came about. Guess I’ll have to wait for the 50th if I’m still around.

    Loved the Romy and Michele movie.

    Lee
    A Faraway View

  25. #32 by Cindy Sample on May 25, 2012 - 11:13 am

    As far as I’m concerned a high school reunion is material central and you have the option of attending two different reunions! I remember noticing that the football stars were heavier and balder and the cheerleaders still looked good which was kind of annoying. Just think of how many new characters you’ll discover for your books, and if necessary, I’d be more than happy to kill any of them on paper for you. Have fun and report back!

  26. #33 by Lanette on May 25, 2012 - 11:15 am

    You’re younger than me? That’s not fair. Rant’s over. I was terrified to go to my 20th reunion because I was the odd introvert that always tried too hard to fit in. You know what I realized when I went? Those people weren’t teenagers anymore, and they acted like grown ups. It was the shock of my life, and I’ve kept in touch with a few of them since. Go. Trust me. You’ll be glad you did.

  27. #34 by Marina Adair (@MarinaEAdair) on May 25, 2012 - 11:15 am

    You should absolutely go. Some of those moments we look for to help validate the person that we have become only happen when we visit the places where we have been. Story or not, you will come out of it with memories and the reminder that you are following and living your dream.How many people can say that? I say go, own the amazing woman you are and Party like it’s 1999…or 1992!

    And then tell us how it went.

  28. #35 by tomburkhalter on May 25, 2012 - 11:22 am

    And I thought my grade school career was screwed up! My Dad worked for an Army contractor and as a result we moved around like we WERE an Army family. Can’t match your experience of repeating 10th grade three times — although I went from one school to another that year, and it was NOT GOOD. The consensus among the friends I made at that high school when our ten-year reunion came up was that we were (a) too busy (b) we’d kept the friends we wanted (c) couldn’t care less if the ——– place burned down and (e) they’d been too cool for us and now we were waaay too cool for them. No comfort zone involved in that decision — just total indifference. I think the discussion took about five minutes.

    As for school administrators, Mark Twain’s comment that “God made an idiot for practice, and then He made a School Board” probably applies.

    If you go, hope you have fun! If not, hope you don’t care.

  29. #36 by Charley Pearson on May 25, 2012 - 11:24 am

    OK, so where DO babies come from? (insert evil chuckle)
    Enjoy it!

  30. #37 by Rayne Hall (@RayneHall) on May 25, 2012 - 11:25 am

    How about attending – and treating it as a research opportunity? Tell yourself you’re there to gather material and inspiration for a story about school reunions. This way, if it’s a wash-out, you won’t feel you’ve wasted your time and money; rather, you’ll have gained valuable insights and inspiration.

  31. #38 by Joanna Branson on May 25, 2012 - 11:28 am

    Go to both of the reunions, Kristen! You rock, and they deserve to know what an amazing author and person they had in their graduating class!

    Of course, I say that as a person who was lucky enough to get out of going to my 20-year reunion at the last minute. Initially, I wasn’t going to go because the best idea the planning committee could come up with was holding our reunion in the head-cheerleader’s parent’s back yard (like ALL those parties that most of us were never invited to in high school! Hello?). Then, I decided to show up anyway, start a rebellion, and move the reunion to a bonfire by the river outside of town, like I did to all those aforementioned parties. At least we’d have alcohol there! Then my husband’s grandmother died a week before my reunion and we traded in our airline tickets to Sacramento for tickets to Atlanta, GA to attend her funeral instead. Frankly, I think it was probably more fun!

    For the past two years, my hicktown high school has been holding all-school reunion picnics around July 4th when people are in town anyway for local Frontier Days and the “official” reunion of the year. I actually enjoy attending those since many of my friends were older or younger than me anyway. It’s pretty cool to see people my 92-year-old grandmother’s age attending each year though sad to realize that many of them have never escaped that valley.

    Anyway, my two cents worth? Go to both and ROCK THEIR WORLDS!

  32. #39 by KM Huber on May 25, 2012 - 11:31 am

    Really enjoyed your previous post on comfort zone. In that post, as well as this one, I am reminded of the distinction between being authentic and being comfortable. As you point out, moving out of our comfort zone provides growth as does being our authentic self. Trust your instincts on this one, Kristen, meaning listen to your heart and then your head.

    Karen

  33. #40 by lisabouchard on May 25, 2012 - 11:31 am

    You should go. I only attended one high school (which can be worse in some ways – no fresh starts when you really screw up) and although I had a tiny circle of friends it didn’t matter. People who barely registered my existence back then were genuinely happy to see me and catch up on what I’d been doing.

    It was bizarre.

    Anyway – go. Be determined to have fun, and if nothing else, laugh at other people.

    Lisa
    PS – Several people crashed the party and no one cared.

  34. #41 by BobR on May 25, 2012 - 11:32 am

    I’ve had variations on that same dream. Odd.

    I was my senior class president. (Nobody else ran.) Our 30th is coming up next year. About a year and a half ago I put everyone who I tracked down on FB into a reunion group and announced that ours would take place in April 2013 on the Caribbean coast of Costa Rica. I think the few who show up will really enjoy themselves.

  35. #42 by MoniqueE. on May 25, 2012 - 11:37 am

    I was an outsider in high school as well…painfully shy and overweight. I ended up going to my fifteen year reunion because one of the few friends I had then talked me into it. (She didn’t want to go alone). What I got out of it was a perspective I never thought I’d have. These people liked me from afar. They were welcoming to me and they were interested in me as an adult. I did not sit on the sidelines all night like I expected to…and while I am not inclined to go again, I left with a more benevolent feeling towards my former classmates.

    I say go, you might be pleasantly surprised.You are a successful author now. When I went, I was unemployed and I still had a good time.

  36. #43 by judysalamachafeb29 on May 25, 2012 - 11:38 am

    My 20th was the one and only I’ve been to…and was the best. By 20 years everyone seemed ready to accept we were out of high school and most of us doing something we were ok telling each other. I had no idea it was the 2nd or 3rd of many careers to come…the good thing was I loved each and every career…love the journey…and still following the road not taken. And not getting much sleep either.

    Pick the reunion where there are friends/not so friendly then/could be friendly now that you want to connect with…you are a networker…network…you might find your best friend or all or someone to lead you towards your next adventure…do it all and enjoy! or not…those times have stories, too. judy

  37. #44 by Louis Burklow on May 25, 2012 - 11:45 am

    Don’t waste so much time worrying about it unless you’re one of those people who high school was the highlight of you life (I’m guessing not). I went to my 10-year reunion and found I was aging much better than most of my former classmates. I’ve never gone to another. Go if you want to; otherwise, don’t worry about it.

  38. #45 by Les Howard on May 25, 2012 - 11:52 am

    My class of 1964 has a reunion every 10 years. I’ve been to two and missed two. The fiftieth is already in the planning stages. I definitely plan to go.

    I was never a member of the in-crowd but I like to catch up on all my friends and see where their lives have taken them.

  39. #46 by patricefitzgerald on May 25, 2012 - 11:54 am

    You MUST go. At my 20th… I think it was the 20th… I had the pretty, popular and cool cheerleader come up to me and say… “You’re a LAWYER? Wow. I’m in a dead-end job. You were always so smart.” It was an eye-opener for someone who was uncool, heavy, and never felt totally accepted.

    As folks mentioned above, there will be a lot of classmates who look much the worse for wear — and you’ll stand out as being gorgeous and hot and successful and intelligent and funny and… you’ll pretty much be the coolest one there. So don’t worry about that. Plus, they’re all grownups by now.

    It will change the way you remember your school years. Don’t even think of missing it. They will all be thrilled to know you, with your writing career! Bring lots of business cards.

    (Oh, and the most important part? Being able to check out all the guys you kinda had crushes on and find out who admired you all along from afar…)

  40. #47 by Ruth Hartman Berge on May 25, 2012 - 12:01 pm

    What the heck, go! You’ll most likely run into a few people you really didn’t know you were missing and have a great time catching up. At the very minimum, you can hand out cards right and left :) It’s a win/win!

  41. #48 by Alice on May 25, 2012 - 12:08 pm

    That’s a bummer having been to so many schools. but I say GO. Cause you can always leave. It’s not like you have to wait for the bell to get the hell out.

  42. #49 by jamielynne82 on May 25, 2012 - 12:11 pm

    I say go! I didn’t go to my 10 year because the idea of hanging out with 28 d-bags from high school getting drunk wasn’t appealing. I’m all about the 20 year though…most of the people have matured by then right?? :)

  43. #50 by tomwisk on May 25, 2012 - 12:13 pm

    Go already. You’re going to rock the house. How many of you fellow alums get to spread joy and wisdom to people across the US? You know the asshats that bugged you? They’re going to try to impress their fellow alums with the fact the sell used cars in two counties or have the largest Amway franchise. All you’ve got to do is slip them a card, smile, and try to connect with the cute boy in Health and Wellness. Enjoy. BTW My high school no longer exists. We’re forced to reune with our crosstown rivals.

  44. #51 by John Holton on May 25, 2012 - 12:13 pm

    I’m two years from my 40th reunion, I haven’t been at the last three, and I don’t plan on being at the 40th, either. I know one person that I want to see, and a whole lot that I don’t. High school was the pits.

  45. #52 by complynn on May 25, 2012 - 12:41 pm

    This is easy: attending the ’92 puts you in the comfort zone of people you knew better. Waiting for next year not only shakes up your comfort zone but also allows you to “meet” the ’93 classmates as adults.
    If there are ’92 people you might want to catch up on, ask one of the organizers to post your email (or other contact info) on whatever message board they arrange. That let’s others come to you — no crash involved. (Besides, Batman won’t be there.) If I can use a Carnivalesque reference.)

  46. #53 by leegaldeeva on May 25, 2012 - 12:47 pm

    I’ve been out of law school for 8 years and I still have dreams about high school. Mind you, I planned my 10 year reunion a couple of years ago! It went well…and it does sorta make you feel better about yourself. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve avoided people at Trader Joe’s because I don’t want to get all depressed hearing about how their lives are going nowhere. Go. Dazzle them!! You’ll feel amazing :)

  47. #54 by MegansBeadedDesigns on May 25, 2012 - 1:05 pm

    I wonder how long reunions will be around… considering that most of use in our 20s have everyone we ever liked form HS on our Facebook pages. It’s a strange notion…

  48. #55 by 1wanderingtruthseeker on May 25, 2012 - 1:12 pm

    I think you should go to both! You get to check out the other folks. I went to a 20th and it was a blast. Some of us don’t age as well as others! That always makes you feel better.

  49. #56 by Jane Bailey Bain on May 25, 2012 - 1:25 pm

    Definitely go! One of the best things at my high school reunion was seeing that the boy with ginger curls and thick glasses is now a millionaire. Whilst the queen bee had married young and looked decidedly jaded. It makes you realize that there is fairness in the universe after all.
    It’s interesting how many of us writer types had challenging teenage years. But maybe that means most people find life tough at times: it’s just that some of our contemporaries were better at projecting their misery onto others. Twenty years on, we’ve all done different things and there’s less comparison and competition.
    And it’s going to make such great blog material…!

  50. #57 by Lynn Kelley on May 25, 2012 - 1:28 pm

    No doubt it, you’ve got to go. I was a nobody in HS, but I’ve gone to the 10, 20, and 30 year reunions and I got to know people that I didn’t really know in HS. Most of my friends graduated the year after me, and my best friend who graduated my year hasn’t gone to any of the reunions. I hope she goes to the 40th, which is in two years. I knew that if I didn’t go, I’d always wonder what I missed. The casual get-together the night before the 30th reunion was more fun than the reunion itself for me. But at all the reunions, I had a good time reconnecting with friends I was on sports teams with or knew since grade school but didn’t hang out with in HS. People are interesting and you’re a people person. Go and enjoy!

    Thanks for the clip from Romy & Michele. Hilarious movie. My middle daughter loves to quote lines from it, and it cracks me up!

  51. #58 by ThreeKingsBooks on May 25, 2012 - 1:30 pm

    About everyone says you should go. My angel, James, thinks you should, too. Just sayin’. I mean, an angel is an angel. Presumably, they’re capable of the bigger picture. Right?

  52. #59 by By The Hilt on May 25, 2012 - 1:33 pm

    You know, if nothing else, you’ll get a good story out of it. I say go. As you’ve said, leave your comfort zone and come out a better person.

  53. #60 by kimterry on May 25, 2012 - 2:03 pm

    Oh, c’mon, Kristen. Practice what you preach. :-) Step outside your comfort zone and into your reunion. Seeing the erstwhile “in-crowders” who have since lost their hair and acquired built-in inner tubes around their middles is worth it. You can always send the whole thing to YouTube.

    • #61 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 25, 2012 - 2:24 pm

      Great, now EVERYONE will be terrified to talk to ME! LOL

  54. #62 by Richard Monro on May 25, 2012 - 2:07 pm

    Kristen, life is a great leveler. The once in crowd are now overweight, balding and having to accept the painful fact that they are not 10% of what they once thought they were. You are way ahead of the curve and rocking life. Go and let them see someone who really has it going on. Strut your stuff Girl!

  55. #63 by Yatin on May 25, 2012 - 2:22 pm

    I am half across the glob from my graduating school & most of are scattered all over the world, literally from Australia to Canada & where where in between. We never had a re-union. Reading your post, if I were you I’d go with my chin up :)

  56. #64 by Jess Witkins on May 25, 2012 - 2:34 pm

    Oh you really couldn’t have picked a better image than Heather Mooney from Romy and Michelle. Things might work out well if your husband can pick you up in a helicopter or if you both do a dramatic interpretation of Time After Time. Let me know if that works! I don’t have the same resources you do so I’ll probably just tell everyone I invented post-its.

    If you know more people and have more friends in this class I’d go to this reunion. I hope you have fun and impress everyone with your jedi skills. But if you’re bored, use the helicopter!

  57. #65 by luckygurl on May 25, 2012 - 2:53 pm

    Meh. I always find these kinds of events overrated. It seems like you’re an extrovert who’d actually go chat people up and possibly find a new kindred spirit, though. I’d be the one in the corner counting the seconds until I could leave… There seems to be something weirdly powerful about the whole memory of high school, isn’t there? I feel pretty confident that most people who’ll be attending will have feelings similar to yours, yet we’re all “afraid” of what other people will be thinking of us…

  58. #66 by Melissa Maygrove on May 25, 2012 - 2:59 pm

    I went to mine. They’re overrated. But what the heck – go to both. :)

  59. #67 by Picasilly on May 25, 2012 - 3:33 pm

    I would go, because everyone else will be in the same boat as you. No one actually looks forward to going to their high school reunion. The only ones that do are the people who peaked in high school and want to relive their glory days. That doesn’t sound like it was you. ;-)

  60. #68 by Kim on May 25, 2012 - 3:51 pm

    “and it was required that I not be confused where babies came from.” Ahahaha. Great post!

  61. #69 by lanceschaubert on May 25, 2012 - 4:23 pm

    Go, but take a good book.

  62. #70 by Yvette Carol on May 25, 2012 - 5:16 pm

    Don’t go!!!! Trust your instincts, they’re always right. I’ve been invited to reunions before and have skipped every single one. I have no wish whatsoever to revisit my high school years. They’re dead & buried, where they belong!
    Hope that helps :-)
    Yvette Carol

  63. #71 by princessfiona01 on May 25, 2012 - 6:12 pm

    Hi Kristen,
    I totally jumped ship at the end of my second last year of school. I was an introvert at boarding school (shudder). I worked for a year and then went back and finished my last year at an entirely different school. I didn’t get to go to either reunion for various reasons and always regretted it. The one I regretted most was the school I didn’t graduate from because that was where the friends I wished I kept in touch with were.
    Fi

  64. #72 by Julie Glover on May 25, 2012 - 6:47 pm

    I was on the fence for my 25th year reunion as well. In fact, I was AWOL for over 20 years after high school. I got out, went to college, my parents moved, and I didn’t return to my hometown for approximately forever (or at least long enough for some of my writer friends to be born, grow to adulthood, and start a writing career — boy, do I feel old). Then I ran into a high school buddy in a restaurant near me and finally got on their radar. No more dodging.

    When the 25-year reunion came up, I threw my hat in and decided to give it a shot. If nothing else, I’d have a hotel room for the weekend with housekeeping service and some nice meals out. As it turns out, I had a GREAT time! We attendees were much the same in personality, but all of those ridiculous strata (aka Rush’s Subdivisions) were gone. After twenty-five years, we all had an appreciation that life is tough and none of that petty stuff mattered.

    Thus my vote is GO. Stretch yourself. Don’t look back wondering “What if I had gone?” Just go for it. And we had someone attend our reunion who moved in our junior year and didn’t graduate with us, but they identified with our school, our class, so attending our reunion made sense.

  65. #73 by sjhigbee on May 25, 2012 - 7:16 pm

    For one reason or another (not in the right place @ the right time) I didn’t get to go to the 10 or 20 year reunion of my school – but did turn up to the 30 year event. And it was GREAT.

    For a variety of reasons, I was also a square peg in a round hole – something of a desperate over-achiever @ school. Who – unlike you – hasn’t exactly gone out and set the world on fire… So I wasn’t exactly looking forward to the knowing sneers when I ended up telling everyone that so far, all I’d done was fail at the marriage to the guy I’d been dating way back when they knew me – along with raising a couple of children and giving birth to a bunch of fiercely loved sci fi books that no one else seems to want. Yet…

    But whatever they have said behind my back, I was greeted with warmth and interest and found it a fascinating experience to see how everyone else turned out. Mostly really nice people, as it happened. So do go. It took the edges off some raw memories for me. Probably, it’ll do the same for you, too.

  66. #74 by annstanleywriting on May 25, 2012 - 7:26 pm

    Only go if you want to know what happened to other people, or you want to collect stories. Don’t go to prove anything. I went to my tenth and was surprised to discover that most of the people I went to high school with hadn’t done anything interesting with their lives. The girls were married with kids, and at most had gone to two years of college. The guys were construction workers and mailmen. I didn’t even remember half of them. Only a couple of people had interesting stories. My life seemed positively scintillating compared to theirs. I’ve never gone back for another dose of boring.

  67. #75 by Adriana Ryan on May 25, 2012 - 7:29 pm

    I think you have to pick your battles, even when it comes to getting out of your comfort zone. I say skip the reunion–you switched school so many times, and do you honestly care about what happened to all those people?

  68. #76 by Sonia G Medeiros on May 25, 2012 - 7:55 pm

    Aaaah…high school. Joss Whedon had it right. High school is hell. LOL. Yeah, I’d go. You’re pretty stinkin’ awesome. You encourage, inspire and educate us everyday. And, yeah, after 20 years, you get to laugh (inside) as all the hotties/populars who were mean are now suffering from gravity, among other things. :D

  69. #77 by tucsonmike on May 25, 2012 - 7:55 pm

    I went to my 25th. Wouldnt go again. If your life is what you want now, you are where you are supposed to be. No point in reliving the past.

  70. #78 by Andi on May 25, 2012 - 8:19 pm

    I would only go if I had a reason to go (good friends I’d lost touch with – something like that). Otherwise, I suffered from the same painful shyness and don’t love the idea of being whisked back to a time and place (or with people) who would likely bring it all back -lol. I’ve got nothing to prove and don’t really care what anyone else is doing. I’m still in touch with my true friends (who will probably beg me to go to my own reunion next year – I’m also a class of ’93 grad) and honestly, the idea of a 20 year reunion stresses me out more than excites me! Would love to hear all about it if you decide to go, though.

  71. #79 by Teresakaragas@gmai on May 25, 2012 - 8:48 pm

    I didn’t go to mine and I had regrets… I say go.

  72. #80 by Tracy on May 25, 2012 - 8:53 pm

    Such a simple, but loaded question. Why does HS haunt us so? Even for those of us without all those moves? I have not been to either my 10th or 20th reunions. While I had a great group of friends (most of whom were NOT carry overs from elementary or middle school, which says a lot) I was not popular, nor a geek, but somewhere in the middle. This whole time, I had the pleasure of having a younger sister who was very popular and in the “in” crowd since 4th grade. Not easy. So, I have kept in touch with exactly two people from HS, one of whom I met in 3rd grade when she moved into my neighborhood and we’ve been best friends since. I feel no regrets not attending my reunions.
    All of that said, what I will say is that in the 5 years since my 20th, I have run into people from HS who seem to have a different view of me than I had of myself during those years. I have tried to be more open minded and let old wounds close and heal. I now consider myself friends with some of these people and might even hit my 30th. I still have 5 years to prepare. :)
    Final thought- go ahead and crash the 92 reunion; if that’s where most of your friends were it makes the most sense.
    A2Z Mommy and What’s In Between</a?

  73. #81 by Addy Rae on May 25, 2012 - 9:11 pm

    The point of a reunion is to see your friends and casual friends from High School and see how things have changed. Go to the one where your friends will be, and don’t sweat the technicalities. :)

  74. #82 by Anne O'Connell (@annethewriter) on May 25, 2012 - 9:16 pm

    Hi Kristen,
    I’m not sure I can add much more to what’s already been said (you obviously struck a chord with this one). Do you have better things to do on that night with people who you do know and love? Or maybe another edit of the latest book you’re working on? Or, an outline of a new book that’s been rolling around in your head? You’ve outlined more than enough reasons not to go and the reasons you want to are not convincing you… so I think you have your answer. If you really want to reconnect, there’s always Facebook. I’ve actually connected with a small group of people I started elementary school with (who still live in my hometown) and we get together at least once a year now. We don’t need a reunion to do that (although this year will be our 30 year reunion… eek)!

    On another note… those recurring dreams! I have one that I’m late for class, I don’t know where it is, my schedule with all the information on it is in my locker for which I can’t remember the combination and no one in the office has any idea of where I should be!!! Amazing what subconscious trauma our high school years can trigger.

    I can’t wait to hear what you decide!
    Anne :)
    P.S. Just to fess up, I did go to my 20 year reunion and just hung out with the people I already kept in touch with and we all agreed that we could have just gone out for a nice dinner together (and it would have been cheaper).

  75. #83 by altitudemom on May 25, 2012 - 9:17 pm

    We had a happy hour at a bar, which was owned by a fellow classmate, the night before the reunion which ended up being WAYYYY better than the reunion itself the following night. A lot of the locals who figured they ran into everyone around town and didn’t want to attend the reunion met up with those of us who had to fly in and it was such a wonderful time! The reunion was a prettied-up time that included spouses and dancing and still lots of laughs. To hear stories of where people have been in life, along with where and whom they have settled down is just priceless!
    You will only regret not going. Doesn’t matter who you were back then— people will see you for who you are today and you’ll probably make some connections you never expected!

  76. #84 by Alarna Rose Gray on May 25, 2012 - 9:47 pm

    Reunions are a tough one. My rule of thumb – don’t go unless you’re successful. Which you ARE – in every way. I mean, wow! I thought 5 schools was bad enough…I don’t know how you did it :)

  77. #85 by MaLinda Johnson on May 25, 2012 - 10:04 pm

    I have lots of thoughts on high school reunions. I was abused horribly by many of my classmates (or treated with haughty indifference, which was sometimes worse) and have no desire to see most of them again for any length of time. I’ve found a lot of them on social networks and there are no surprises as to how most of them turned out. However, a little piece of me wants to go to a reunion and rub it in their shocked faces about how well I turned out. I would tell you that if you choose to go, wear a jaw dropping outfit and hold your head high about the fact that you are successful. :)

  78. #86 by Genie Gabriel on May 25, 2012 - 11:37 pm

    Hi, Kristen! My school years sound quite a bit different than yours. I went to a small school–35 in my graduating class and I went to the same grade school for 8 years and the same high school all 4 years. Some of these kids I knew all that time. At my 10-year reunion, some people were still trying to impress others. By the 20th reunion, that had pretty much dropped away. At 30 years, all pretense was gone and people were just glad to see everyone. It will be interesting to hear your follow-up story on whether you go or not.

  79. #87 by blsmadden on May 26, 2012 - 3:04 am

    You have plenty to say and show for yourself. Even if the situation becomes awkward and you wind up chatting to the caterers, you’ll have shown them what you can and have achieved, things most of them haven’t and will never come close to measuring up to. I think it would be worth going.

  80. #88 by javeriyasayeedsiddiqui on May 26, 2012 - 3:48 am

    I think you should totally go to the reunion! :D
    Because today you are a successful and yes a very popular writer and I can bet you wouldn’t have to spend your time in a corner :) all the best!

  81. #89 by mlatimerridley on May 26, 2012 - 6:48 am

    Go for it, what’s the worst that can happen? (I think I can now hear the doctor pepper music playing!) If it goes well, whoo ya! If it all crashes and burns to tiny cinders just repeat the mantra ‘its all an experience’ with a smile plastered on your face as you lunge for the exit!

  82. #90 by r.a.thrift on May 26, 2012 - 7:33 am

    You’ll have no problem at the reunion, Kristen. As soon as people find out you’re a writer, they’ll scat for fear of being the subject of you next book!

  83. #91 by Julie Day on May 26, 2012 - 7:48 am

    If there are people you knew and liked and were friends with then that are going, I’d be curious to find out how they are now. I hated secondary school, too. I was bullied by two different types of people, probably cos I was different. I was quiet, and maybe they felt I could be pushed around easily. If it was my school reunion, I don’t think I’d go unless I knew that some people I’d been friends with were going.

  84. #92 by Gregory Carrico on May 26, 2012 - 7:52 am

    Hmmm… the adult popularity contest… A chance for the successful to strut, and for the less successful to pretend they are doing what they love instead of chasing gold.
    Wow, I didn’t even know I was so cynical! Where did that come from?!?

    As a Navy brat, I was pretty lucky that my family happened to remain in one spot for the duration of my high school years. I made some decent friends, no major enemies or arch-nemeses; but I always felt a bit like Attenborough, watching the curious habits and behaviors of a strange race of people from the bushes. They had all played soccer together in diapers while I bounced from Orlando to Charleston every four years. I was always the etic observer, allowed to participate, liked, even, but never really part of the tribe.
    Which is why, on a personal level, I really couldn’t care less about going to my reunions. I’ve kept in touch with the people who matter to me, and don’t have anything to prove to the rest.
    But, still… that’s a lot of readers… :-)
    I hope you find my non-answer to your question helpful.
    Cheers!

    • #93 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 26, 2012 - 6:48 pm

      Thanks for the comment. It has been fun listening to everyone’s experiences and advice. I have a very wise and thoughtful following for sure.

  85. #94 by Marika Weber on May 26, 2012 - 9:41 am

    I graduated in 1985 from W.T. White in Dallas. I regret, somewhat, going back to my 10 year. The girls still hadn’t grown up but the guys had grown up. Their wives were awesome, too. My 20th class reunion was a blast. It was smaller, more intimate. You really got to talk to people and reconnect. Plus, I just had a baby and got married the year before, so I finally got to brag.

    I would go back just to see what’s going to happen. You never know…you might reconnect with some folks that you NEVER were friends with in high school. It happened to me. :)

    Marika
    maw1725@gmail.com

    • #95 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 26, 2012 - 6:47 pm

      That is my main goal. I am not, per se, afraid of anyone. No one was cruel to me (at that school). I just don’t really know anyone, but maybe I can change that? *shrugs* From the comments it looks like I need to go :D.

  86. #96 by mintedberries on May 26, 2012 - 9:48 am

    I would say go!. I have the same fear/sentiments in attending reunions. Coz sometimes, especially if you do not have that group of friend who you used to hang out with way back, it would be a bit awkward to go without being sure if someone would even talk to you… but you see we have to conquer our own fears :) reunions don’ happen often, rightt?

  87. #97 by jodenton445 on May 26, 2012 - 10:30 am

    Hi, Kristen. I can’t picture you standing in a corner…at least not now. But I’d say for you to go to both and simply have fun and enjoy the experience. We’ve got together for our 5, 10, 20, 25 and several times a year in between. A lot of us live abroad (I’m from Costa Rica) and not everyone makes it to every reunion. We still love it! So go ahead and take a chance on positive. Good luck!

  88. #98 by Cathryn Leigh on May 26, 2012 - 10:44 am

    You probably have more people who feel they were friends with you than you think you do. At my 15 year reunion a couple years ago, I ended up hanging out with people I hadn’t talk to a lot. I had fun. And being able to hold your head up and laugh is what makes it better. (I also didn’t have to worry about any teachers since the reunion was put on by the alumni who used facebook to find us all..lol)

    :} Cathryn

  89. #99 by fannyfae on May 26, 2012 - 11:04 am

    I personally blew off my20 year reunion because I felt that I had absolutely nothing in common with my “official” graduating class. Most of my friends were in the class prior to mine and since I got all of my needed credits a year early I told the school board I wanted to graduate with my friends and get on with my life. They refused saying, “it’s never been done before””. It was a stupid reason so I spent my “official” senior year as a freshman in college and showed up to pick up my diploma in May. Why waste the entire school year in classes that I didn’t need or in study hall doing nothing?

    When I got the 20 year reunion cards in the mail from my “official” class, I tossed them. If you have former hostages that you connected with, by all means go. If not, why not do something you enjoy doing with people in your life that you love right now, rather than worrying or slaving in order to look gorgeous and successful to a bunch of people who you don’t care all that much about and who you aren’t going to talk to past the evening anyway?

  90. #100 by marsharwest on May 26, 2012 - 12:26 pm

    If you go by the voting here, Kristen, it looks like you have to go. I only went to my 10th reunion. The high school was my 10th through 12 years of schooling, and I only attended 2 years. So not as many as you. Unlike you, I had a short history with these folks. Half were Air Force Brats and half locals. Most of my closest were the AFBs and didn’t attend the reunion. My husband knew more people there than I did, because they’d gone on to the local college he attended. (Wierd we both went to that college, but he still knew more than I.) Interesting how many here speak of being somewhat introverted in h.s. Maybe lots of us are just late bloomers. Nothing wrong with that.
    As a former school board member and school administrator, let me apologize to you for their decisions that caused all that repitions of the health course. That’s crazy, and someone should’ve been able to figure it out. Did your folks ask all the way up the chain or just stop with the local principal or counselor? On the other hand, Kristen, look at what a great blog topic you’ve got because of the situation. You’ve given all of us a chance to sound off about our own experiences. My vote is with those who say go. You’ve got a lot to crow about, and that’s a great venue for it.

    • #101 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 26, 2012 - 6:36 pm

      My high school doesn’t even compare to the stupid crap admins did to me in middle school. I was in honors classes in 5th grade, which meant I was doing a 6th grade curriculum. We moved two miles north to Crowley and I switched schools, but I missed the test for honors…so they put me back in the SAME books. I worked my tail off and by 7th grade was back in honors classes, which meant an 8th grade curriculum. Switched back to Forth Worth and guess what happened AGAIN? I missed the test date to place for honors classes and got to repeat the exact same books again. Frankly, by the time I was in high school I hated everybody. I was so tired of being jerked around by the bureaucracy. And my parents had other things on their priority list and I rarely made the top of it. But, is what it is. We learn, we move on and it makes us better.

  91. #102 by Shannon @ Distracted by Prayer on May 26, 2012 - 12:40 pm

    You are freakin’ HYSTERICAL,so I believe you owe it to the people who caused such pain, thus added to your future success, to go to this reunion.
    I attended mine several years ago, and reconnected with a friend who had joined the Air Force and flew missions in Afghanistan. Less than a year after the reunion, he was killed in action. I’m so glad I was able to laugh with him and celebrate the high school madness.
    Even though something this tragic will hopefully not happen to you, you may make a wonderful and unexpected connection. I hope so!

  92. #103 by Paisley Kirkpatrick on May 26, 2012 - 12:40 pm

    I don’t usually comment, but read every one of your great posts. This one hit close to home as I have my 50th (where the heck did all those years go) reunion. Unlike you, I went through all my school years with some of the same people. I was the shy, quiet type that was tall and had a pimply face. I was not accepted among the popular group. I have attended a couple of reunions and really like it when the popular ones thought I’d married a gorgeous man. (Still married to him nearly 44 years later). There is one thing that will be different this reunion. I have been asked to sell my book at the reunion – my first book which will be published 4 days before the event. Not only did my classmate who contacted me get excited to hear of my success after 22 years of never giving up on my dream, but she copied the email to all of our classmates. THEY all know now and I am gobsmacked that they want to check out my story. I suppose you can call this a big turnaround, but I will walk into that room with my head held high. My editor told me to show my stuff and I am.

  93. #104 by rainbowinclouds on May 26, 2012 - 12:45 pm

    You should totally go! If nothing else, it will be a great source of content for your writing. I went to my 30th last year. The event itself was a dud, held in July in our high school cafeteria with no air conditioning. How could I resist? One guy wore an Air Force jump suit. He must’ve been boiling but he wanted to be SURE everyone knew he was in the reserves. You can’t make up that kind of stuff. Have fun, & take notes!!

  94. #105 by miriamapace on May 26, 2012 - 2:42 pm

    Dear Kristen, Boy did you hit a nerve. I hated high school. I went to a small all girl’s high school which was an experience I would never subject my children to. The class was very small and being all girls, catty and mean on a scale I like to think male/female schools aren’t. I was painfully shy and tended to stutter under stress. I was always the one who laughed at the wrong time, or said the wrong things. I had so few friends that returning for a reunion was hardly worth the effort, so I’ve never gone to one.

    I’m coming up on my 40th reunion in a few years. Won’t go to that one either. My high school is very proud of the judges, lawyers, corporate big shots and a senator who graduated from it, but not so proud of the mothers, writers, and less glamorous people who have no press release appeal when it comes to fund-raising.

  95. #106 by Marvin Mayer on May 26, 2012 - 6:32 pm

    Hey, Kristen! I am in my mid-70s, and I have never attended a class reunion. In fact, I even missed my chance to walk across the stage to get my diploma. Here’s why. I had the opportunity to spend the summer driving a shirt salesman across the mid west and get paid for doing it! Never an over achiever in school, the chance to make $40 a week, plus have all of my expenses paid by my employer, not to mention the chance for a 17-year old kid to drive the latest model luxury car meant that I had to be at “work” when commencement exercises were conducted. I don’t regret missing commencement, and I don’t regret missing my 10th, 25th, 40th, or 50th class reunion. So, do what pleases you (as I’m sure you will/did.) Whatever decision you make/made will be/was the right one.

  96. #107 by Laura Ritchie on May 26, 2012 - 9:10 pm

    “Failure can be a tombstone or a stepping stone; the choice is ours.”

    I really like this saying. Especially coming from someone who had quite a time of it while growing up. Thanks for being an inspiration to others!

  97. #108 by caseykayb on May 26, 2012 - 11:35 pm

    I say leave the past behind you. It’s not really that important to go to your high school reunion to become friends with the people you didn’t when you were actually in school. Then again, no one could pay me enough money to go back to my high school with those people, so I may be a bit jaded to the whole idea of a reunion.

  98. #109 by Emi on May 27, 2012 - 4:22 am

    Too funny!!

    I never moved around in high school (which was only two years ago). But I wish I had! AH! High school – embarrassing, awkward, hell. My high school had just started the IB (international baccalaureate) program – fancy name for BS! My class only had 8 people. All of whom were already friends with each other since birth and me, my awkward and shy self. I had every class with these people – all day it was awful! My teachers got together and talked about me, saying that I was depressed. They then called my parents to say that I was depressed! I wasn’t depressed! I just can’t help it that I’m shy and this is just the way my face looks when I’m not smiling! It was terrible!
    I’ll never go to my high school reunion! I picked a college far away from everyone! Fresh beginnings! Forget high school ever happened!

    I think you should go! At least for a little while! I mean hey, you took all that talking and put it into a successful book! I’m impressed by it! But a part of me also wants to tell you to forget high school reunions! You’ve clearly moved on to bigger and better things!

  99. #110 by Jerri Lien on May 27, 2012 - 11:11 am

    I have an inordinate affection for the movie Romie and Michelle’s Reunion! Reunions are awkward, for wallflowers like me, anyway! My 20th high school reunion was in 2009, and it wasn’t until the 3rd, yes 3rd, day of reunion that I finally started to feel relaxed and comfortable. Prior to that, I am surprised I didn’t have a heart attack. Our reunion was decent sized, and that’s just a whole lot of reunioning all at one time. Not to mention, it’s kinda embarrassing when you don’t recognize people til the end of the night, after staring at them all night wondering if they were the spouse of a classmate!

    My class’s president lives out of state and I can still hardly believe that I ended up on the planning committee, just because I sent her an e-mail saying people were inquiring about the reunion. Thanks to Facebook, I had an easy time tracking people down and getting the word out about our reunion. This ended up allowing people to reconnect and get a little more comfortable with their former classmates before the big weekend. For shy little me, that was one of the coolest things to come of the reunion – I now am friends with people I rarely even spoke with in high school!

    Oh, and we made sure to invite people that should’ve graduated with us but didn’t for whatever reason. You should go to your reunion. It will give you lots to write about!

  100. #111 by redjim99 on May 27, 2012 - 12:22 pm

    Go, swagger around drink in hand and tell everyone you meet a different story about how you made your million. Shout if asked about it and yell, it was all your fault while pointing and sobbing.
    Maybe not?
    :-)

    Jim

  101. #112 by Juniper on May 27, 2012 - 1:53 pm

    Looking like you do for a 20 year reunion? Not even a question. You’re successful, beautiful, confident and you probably look ten years younger than everyone else. Go, have a dirty martini and flirt with the mean girls’ husbands. ;) Then, go make friends with the ones you wanted to be closer with.

  102. #113 by xyiana on May 27, 2012 - 3:29 pm

    Personally, i am on the fence on this one. I didn’t go to my 10 or my 20 that was held just 2 years ago. Part of me regrets it, but it is a small part. Since i spent most if my time on the outside looking in and i am even more socially inept now than i was then, i figured that i would just be in the same place i was before. A wallflower. A pretty darn good looking wallflower considering the last 20 years, but a wallflower none the less.
    The main difference is people. If you had a few friends, reguardless of how close, that you would like to see and catch up with, go. Best case scenario, you reaquint with people you miss and maybe even accumulate a few new friends. Worst case scenario, it becomes another stepping stone and life lesson that you look back upon shaking your head and smiling. If you look at it from the perspective that no matter what happens, you win… then its bound to be a benificial experience.
    Don’t doubt that you will make the wrong choice because you will make the right choice whichever you decide. It will also make making the decision that much easier. Your heart is set to go, you just have to let your brain catch up.

  103. #114 by Heather Marsten on May 27, 2012 - 7:12 pm

    I haven’t gone back to my reunions – I was one of the ones who was not popular, and so there is no love lost. I only have one or two friends that I wonder what happened to them. I think it could be fodder for characters in books :)

  104. #115 by Gloria Richard Author on May 28, 2012 - 6:16 am

    I say GO! You may be the only Bestselling Author they almost had in their graduating class.

    I empathize with your “that which doesn’t kill us makes us funny” philosophy.

    In our kissing-cousins-to-Mennonite religion, we became the misfits when we moved from bucolic farm country to suburbia near Pittsburgh. I eventually broke through the barriers (or took fake babysitting jobs) to go to dances, movies and parties. Ours was the no-flower-beds house in a sea of well-maintained lawns. Not because my parents were lazy; both worked and Dad was a long-haul truck driver. The Girls (five of us) mowed the lawn. We were close enough in age to share clothes so we could make it through a week without *gasp* a repeat.

    So, I became a people-pleaser with ready wit and self-deprecating humor. As a result, my HS memories are happy. I had a large circle of friends and a HS sweetheart with whom I still communicate.

    College? Freedom? No parental rules? I started over again in the “doesn’t fit in” slow lane and lacked the confidence to repeat my HS performance. Cue Born to be Wild

  105. #116 by nancyelizabethlauzon on May 28, 2012 - 8:19 am

    Have to say I disliked high school – one endless marathon of wanting things and not getting them – and the 20th reunion wasn’t any different. I wandered the hallways feeling the same way I did when I was seventeen. Had an opportunity to apologize to my ex-boyfriend for cheating on him all those years ago and didn’t take it. Sigh …

  106. #117 by Renée A. Schuls-Jacobson on May 28, 2012 - 8:39 am

    You have to go.
    1- You be so hot.
    2 – You be so successful.
    3 – The 20th is the best. All the popular, mean kids have been humbled (read: divorced or gotten fat or gone bald), and all the geeks are now cool and super interesting. I’m telling you, this is your venue. Plus, you’ll be able to write about it. How can you resist? I’m telling you, you will rule!

    • #118 by Andi on May 28, 2012 - 9:07 am

      I feel like Renee is probably right. LOL

  107. #119 by Serena Dracis, Author on May 28, 2012 - 11:56 am

    I hated high school. I was the geeky nerd everyone picked on. Really. One year I was the kid the whole class threw food at…talk about emotionally scarring! Dating? Ha! Now let’s talk emotional satisfaction…went to my 10 year reunion, successful, an expert in my field, fit, confident and nothing like the shy teenager I once was. Dropped jaws and stunned silence. Totally worth every minute. For me, it was proof of ‘that which does not kill you makes you stronger.’ I wasn’t that girl anymore, but she had helped make Me, and it laid to rest any last vestiges of teen angst I may have been carrying around. Plus there was the sweet revenge factor of seeing all the ‘cool kids’ who had picked on me gone to fat and balding. I would say, yes, go for it! Best-selling author is something I’ll bet no one else there has accomplished, and you never know what networking may come from it.

  108. #120 by merlinspielen on May 28, 2012 - 12:31 pm

    I went to my reunion. It was like going back in time and discovering my worst nightmares were still alive. Only worse now with receding hairlines and expanding waistlines and hyper-inflated egos. And of course the gang that I used to hang with did not show up. So no-one actually remembered who I was. In the end it was nothing at all like I thought it would be! The best part were the old photos on display from the photography club – of which I was a camera-carrying geekie member. Dozens of my photos were on the table as I had processed and printed them with my hand-written “humorous” year-book caption underneath.

  109. #121 by rupy on May 28, 2012 - 9:24 pm

    Wow I had to go miles to get to the bottom of this list … (hmm, actually feels a bit like high school!)

    Me, I wouldn’t do a reunion in a fit. Like some others here, i didn’t much like some of the people, and I have no doubt the feelings were mutual.

    The only thing I missed when I left high school were the holidays, so for my two bobs worth, i’d give anything resembling a reunion the wide berth it deserves.

    If you wanted to be in contact with those people you still would be. And going for bragging rights (as deserving as you are), is trivial.

    • #122 by Author Kristen Lamb on May 29, 2012 - 6:56 am

      Rupy, no worries. I read all the comments, for what that is worth. Thanks for taking the time to comment and give your opinion and such a nice compliment :D.

  110. #123 by athenabrady1 on May 30, 2012 - 1:54 pm

    Hi Kisten, which school did you enjoy the most and learn the most at? Go to that one, go to the places that make you feel good and hold the happiest memories, good luck! Let me know how you get on.

  111. #124 by Kristi Stanford on June 3, 2012 - 12:34 pm

    I’m only commenting to say GO. Go to them all or just one- who cares?? More people your age (and mine too- 43) need attitudes like yours. Maybe your hysteria will rub off on someone and make them laugh too!

  112. #125 by Deb Jurkovac on September 7, 2012 - 10:39 pm

    I won’t go. I wasn’t popular, never participated in the class activities, wasn’t a partier, wasn’t married in school and was not the class clown. They are the popular ones at reunions.

  113. #126 by Basil Rousos on October 14, 2012 - 7:55 am

    I won’t be attending my 20th high school reunion in a few weeks. Instead, I will be attending my wife’s med school reunion. Darn. These days it’s easy enough to find the people that you want to keep in touch with.

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