Frankenfriends & Zombie Tweets–Writers, Social Media and the Undead

Writers are funny when it comes to social media. Okay, we are funny when it comes to more than social media. Face it, if you had a normal childhood, you likely never grew up to become a writer. Likely you aren’t rich either, because then you could have afforded therapy.

So if you are a writer, you probably are at least tangentially insane and too cheap to pay for an fancy shrink. It is why we write, right? And this is all well and good, because I think sane people write lousy books anyway, but crazy has advantages and disadvantages. Crazy makes for killer books, but it tends to also lend itself to extreme thinking.

Writers are really bad about all or nothing, even in social media. Either we are on the verge of resorting to adult diapers because we can’t pry away from Twitter, or we hiss and scurry for safety in the shadows when anyone mentions social media.

Writing is a Killer

Writers who are successful have to learn two things. First, we need to learn balance. I still struggle with this. The writer who is going to be here for the long-haul to reap success is the one who gets sleep, exercises and eats more than Skittles chased with Red Bull. Yeah, learned that one the hard way. Also, we must learn to balance when to have that pit bull focus, and when to ease back on the throttle and remember we have other responsibilities…like basic hygeine and social media.

I would love to say that writers didn’t need to do social media, but I already lie about my height and my age and too many lies is just beggin’ for bad juju. So we know we need to participate in social media, and build a platform and write books and floss every day, and it gets overwhelming, and so we resort back to that all or nothing stuff, and disappear.

A Totally True Brief Story About Writers & the Undead

I get that writers already struggle with being mistaken for one of the undead (refer to picture above taken before Starbucks, as you can tell).  In fact, I believe we writers are the cause of all these stories. Seriously.

Werewolves

Legend has it that a monk (early writer) on deadline chained himself to a wall to finish his edits, because he was getting sidetracked with the new social craze…sending carrier pigeons (early version of Twitter). So he had this new chapter of the Bible due or he was totally going to burn for eternity (and you thought revisions were hard on YOU) and so yeah, he chained himself to the wall with nothing but a quill and paper.

When the other monks wanted to play beer pong (what else do you think they invented beer for?), they couldn’t find him. When they went to check on him, they saw he’d turned into this horrible beast with fangs, and there was this full moon. Naturally they thought the moon was turning him into this beast. Easy mistake. No one ever put two and two together that their buddy’s deadline always fell on the full moon.

It wasn’t the moon…it was last-minute revisions that turned him into this beast.

Vampire

Early writer in Transylvania, couldn’t quit his day job of selling…carrots. Stayed up all night writing and all the red ink from edits just, say…let to misunderstandings.

Frankenstein

Early experiments with energy drinks gone horribly wrong.

True stories I just made up. Okay, yes I have a point. I have to make this fun. How else am I going to teachwriters social media unless I coat it with vampires?

The Undead and Social Media

I get it. I understand you guys. I’m a writer first. Sometimes we have to stay up all night and we do seem to grow fangs, normally around the 65th time a family member has interrupted us, since we aren’t really working. I feel your pain. But we have to be really careful that we aren’t bringing undead habits into social media. No one likes to hang out with the undead. Frankenstein? Zero friends. Zombies? Again, zero friends. Vampires? A few friends, but all with serious trust issues.

Zombie Blog and Frankentweet

There are writers who I see all the time and I like their blog and then….GONE. Nowhere on Twitter. No longer commenting. No pulse. Then, just about the time I have mourned their loss and moved on to make new friends?

They come baaaack.

Three months or even six months later, their twitter handles or blogs rises from the dead and needs to feed. Now they are tweeting all the time and talking to people and likely telling everyone about the book they have coming out or just released. Only, if you pay close attention, you will see it is the same tweet trying to appear it’s alive when it isn’t (automated). It has no mind and just prowls for victims readers.

Instead of braaaaaiiiiiiins, it moans saaaaallllllleeeeeesssss, buuuuyyyyyyyy, freeeeeeeeeeee.

Don’t be a Frankenfriend

Remember that all-or-nothing thinking I mentioned at the beginning? That is what gets us in trouble and turns us into a Frankenfriend. If we make these unrealistic goals, or we don’t understand how to use social media effectively, we burn out, we go to extremes…and we don’t get the full benefits of having a social media platform.

Less is More

Social media takes less than 20 minutes a day (unless you add in a blog). Even with a blog? Not that much time. Get my books. We actually have far more impact if we aren’t posting a bunch of times a day. We just have to show up. Attendance counts. A handful of tweets or interactions a day.

Quality, not quantity.

And sure, if you are a Chatty Cathy like me, it is fine, but on those days, weeks when you can’t be chatty? Just pop in. Say “hi.” Give us proof of life. It’s all we ask.

Work in a Team 

Yes, writers need a social media platform, but no one ever said you had to do it all alone. Join up with the WANAs either on Twitter at #MyWANA, Facebook, or the WANA social site, WANATribe (here is an invitation). We work together. All easy-squeezy. Books are not so cost-prohibitive that we can’t support each other.

This is one of the benefits of being a WANA. We are not alone.

When we work as a team, we can pull weight for each other. If we have to do revisions, our pals can guest post for us. We have friends who can tweet about our book or blogs or even just RT the handful of things we post. All of us serve each other because we are totally paying it forward. We know we are going to have to ask for help one day, too.

So what are your thoughts? Are you a member of the Twitter undead? Did you see a light? How did you make it back? What are your stories of social media undead? Heck, let’s have some fun. Do you think writers are the source for all these stories of creatures roaming the night? What’s your version? Have writers been mistaken for any other creatures of the night? Mythical beasts? How do you balance your social media and writing? Are you a WANA and wana give your team a shout-out?

I love hearing from you!

To prove it and show my love, for the month of June, everyone who leaves a comment I will put your name in a hat. If you comment and link back to my blog on your blog, you get your name in the hat twice. If you leave a comment, and link back to my blog, and mention my book We Are Not Alone in your blog…you get your name in the hat THREE times. What do you win? The unvarnished truth from yours truly.

***Changing the contest.

It is a lot of work to pick the winners each week. Not that you guys aren’t totally worth it, but with the launch of WANA International and WANATribe I need to streamline. So I will pick a winner once a month and it will be a critique of the first 20 pages of your novel, or your query letter, or your synopsis (5 pages or less).

And also, winners will now have one business week  (5 days) to claim the prize, because what’s happening is there are actually quite a few people who never claim the critique, so I never know if the spam folder ate it or to look for it and then people miss out. I will also give my corporate e-mail to insure we connect and I will only have a week to return the 20 page edit.

There are a couple people I found in the spam folder yesterday, so will be getting edits back to Patricia Morris, Rachel Sullivan, Pauline Jones, and Jennette Mbewe. You are not forgotten. Chad Carver? Send your pages to kristen @ wana intl dot com because I still can’t find your pages.

At the end of June I will pick a winner for the monthly prize. Good luck!

I also hope you pick up copies of my best-selling books We Are Not Alone–The Writer’s Guide to Social Media and Are You There, Blog? It’s Me, Writer And both are recommended by the hottest agents and biggest authors in the biz. My methods teach you how to make building your author platform FUN. Build a platform and still have time left to write great books.

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  1. #1 by Sharon Hamilton on June 20, 2012 - 8:36 am

    And then there’s Frankenfiction. Don’t get me started…

  2. #4 by Juliana Brandt (@julianalbrandt) on June 20, 2012 - 8:40 am

    This is hilarious! And so true! Sometimes it’s hard to keep up with social media, but I think it’s important to at least check in a couple times a week so the world doesn’t think we’ve died. I’ve learned from you that the time for social media isn’t when we need something from others (aka: when we need them to buyyyy!) :)

    • #5 by stephscottil on June 20, 2012 - 11:23 am

      I agree. I check in with the #MyWANA hashtag once or twice a week, and I have a few others I scan beyond my regular list I follow. The trouble is the more people you follow the harder it is to catch up; so I have to remind myself it’s not about reading everyone’s tweets all the time. It’s jumping in every now and then, adding to the conversation, and giving shout outs etc.

      • #6 by Icy Sedgwick on June 20, 2012 - 3:30 pm

        I started unfollowing people who post nothing but links, retweets, or “inspirational” quotes. Makes it much easier to find people I want to talk to :)

  3. #7 by Lanette Kauten on June 20, 2012 - 8:42 am

    How do you know my blogging habits? There are two blonds in my house, and they both have short hair. How did you sneak in and peer over my shoulder without me noticing? If you’re going to stalk me at least be six foot, dark haired, and muscular.

  4. #8 by Pamela Skjolsvik (@pamelaskjolsvik) on June 20, 2012 - 8:43 am

    I joined Triberr but a lot of the posts in my tribe are just about writing and of no interest to people following me because I write about death. I really feel like throwing in the towel sometimes. I find social media sort of maddening. Maybe I’m Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde all rolled into one angry tweeter:)

    • #9 by Author Kristen Lamb on June 20, 2012 - 8:51 am

      Actually most people find death fascinating and it may just have to do with how you are blogging and engaging the audience. You can actually build a huge following, but might need to modify the approach?

    • #10 by kimterry on June 20, 2012 - 11:00 am

      Pam, I’d like to read some of your posts on that topic.

  5. #11 by Marcy Kennedy on June 20, 2012 - 8:48 am

    I can think of so many stories about WANAs helping other WANAs keep their blog alive when something went wrong with their life or when they needed to go away on vacation or to have a baby. Last month, my grandparents were in a serious car accident and had to be moved from their home up north to my town. Because I’d already been dealing with another family situation that month, I’d used up my blog cushion and was facing having nothing to post. I emailed Jessica Chapman, who I met through your Blogging to Build Brand class, and asked if I could reuse a post I’d done for her in February. That along with Melinda VanLone writing a series of guest posts for me that are finishing up today helped get me through a rough patch. I am so appreciative.

  6. #12 by jayallenwriter on June 20, 2012 - 8:51 am

    I’m worse than the undead. I’m a newborn, out of control, clueless, injecting too much venom…..

  7. #13 by athenagrayson on June 20, 2012 - 8:59 am

    I’m an occasional tweet zombie. Sometimes I go days without tweeting, but I don’t even talk to my next-door neighbors every day. I like to tweet or facebook when I have something to say. I don’t like talking just to talk, I feel I need to add something to the conversation. I do re-tweet occasionally, but my stream seems to be filling up with the same re-tweets. Any advice for effectively managing your lists so that your signal to noise ratio stays manageable?

  8. #14 by donyadunlap on June 20, 2012 - 9:12 am

    I love your posts. They crack me up. And I too struggle with social media…or being social at all really. Sometimes I have brilliant, funny things to tweet and then nothing. It’s as if my brain refuses to be witty or even form complete sentences. The pressure to be a master social bug is exhausting and intimidating too so the urge to quit comes over me regularly. So far my lapses have been no more than a few weeks, but that still isn’t good. I’m hoping Michael Hyatt’s book Platform will help. I just started it.

  9. #15 by tomburkhalter on June 20, 2012 - 9:13 am

    Hey, Kristen, you look really good in fangs! All kidding aside this post struck a chord. About three months ago I was really into tweeting and blogging and commenting and bladibladibla. Then warm weather hit, more (9to5) work came my way, no one visited my blog or commented on same, and I was really involved in writing. Which, at the moment, I am stuck on, although I think I’ve got it figured out (need a little more backstory) and am making progress. But it is a dance and a balancing act and sometime I feel like I’ve got three knives, a spoon and a torch going in a fountain and I can feel my forearms cramping up. Heavy sigh. One foot in front of the other. Soldier on. Later!

  10. #16 by neyska on June 20, 2012 - 9:16 am

    After two weeks down with a nasty cold and sinus infection, I can confidently say that zombies were sick writers gone mad with the inability to function proper and get things done. Hoping to get a blog up someday soon. I WILL RISE AGAIN!!!! (maybe)

  11. #17 by corajramos on June 20, 2012 - 9:17 am

    You did it again-a funny post to put across a serious point. Balance. So important for writers because of our powerful concentration abilities. . . there you go, another blog idea –the power of writers and Power Rangers (or Wonder Woman, Superman, etc.). Thanks for continued inspiration and boot to butt admonitions.

  12. #18 by lynnkelleyauthor on June 20, 2012 - 9:32 am

    “…he was getting sidetracked with the new social craze…sending carrier pigeons (early version of Twitter).” Hilarious! You definitely made this post fun, and I can sure relate, having another zombie day here. These are the days I struggle with social media (and everything else). Finding balance, ah, the never ending quest, isn’t it? Just when I think I’ve got a good grip on it, I wake up only to discover it was just a dream. I guess the main thing is to keep trying, right? Thanks, Kristen.

  13. #19 by Staci Troilo on June 20, 2012 - 9:51 am

    Reblogged this on Staci Troilo and commented:
    Hilarious and true. Did you forget the mummy… the one who wrote for so long to meet his deadline and got so cold while doing so that he wrapped himself in sheets until they turned into scraps of linen and he looked like a preserved corpse when his friends came to find him? Sometimes I think I’m that mummy/mommy. Great article Kristen. Love the WANAtribe site, too. I’ll be looking for your book, We Are Not Alone… a friend read it and said it’s great. Thanks for your hard work.

  14. #20 by Julie Day on June 20, 2012 - 9:57 am

    I am a WANA. I go on FB every day, Twitter nearly every day. I usually mention what I am writing to gain interested readers. I blog once a week on either my writing life or living with Asperger’s over the years. I only mention about a success when it happens, but I do have a tag line which mentions my latest story or ebook.

  15. #21 by Pauline Baird Jones on June 20, 2012 - 9:59 am

    Thanks for a good laugh AND wise advice today. I’m clawing my way out of being “undead” and I think it is working. I hope! Loving the WANA International class. :-) It does make me SO aware when I see authors shambling through the ether looking for brains, er, readers. LOL!

  16. #22 by August McLaughlin on June 20, 2012 - 9:59 am

    Thank you for pointing out the fact that social media doesn’t, or shouldn’t, take up much time. I felt a wee bit overloaded when I first jumped in—the whole learning curve thing. Now it’s a fun and useful practice between writing and everything else. Fun post!

  17. #23 by Barbara Forte Abate on June 20, 2012 - 10:05 am

    Well, this is just a little TOO creepy, since I think I may be something of a FrankenWolfZomVamp. And needless to say on account of the hideous mess of a name it makes–really not so pretty.

  18. #24 by Christine Ashworth on June 20, 2012 - 10:10 am

    Aw Kristen. Trust you to nail it. I’ve gotten quiet on Twitter and the blog…and I know I need to get out there again but…honestly, Triberr has done me in. All those zombie posts that I’m tweeting…other people shut out Triberr. So what’s a girl to do? Dazed and confused I once again turn to you for insight, lol…

    At least I haven’t gone back on twitter trying to sell anything!

    Hugs hon…

  19. #25 by Tiffany Ems Pitts on June 20, 2012 - 10:11 am

    FB, Twitter and a blog – they all have different uses. Now that I can tell the difference between the three, I’m better at keeping up on them. But you’re right, if there’s nothing there to see, people think you’re gone.

    As a character exercise, I started keeping a Facebook profile for my dog. It’s fun, it’s interesting to thing about and people love having some sort of interaction with Thor Michaelson (the dog). Lots of them go on to tell me about how much they like him. At some level, they know it’s ME writing the responses but it doesn’t matter. They feel special because of the attention. I definitely hear about it when Thor hasn’t posted anything for a couple of days.

  20. #26 by MegansBeadedDesigns on June 20, 2012 - 10:27 am

    I always try to keep a “reserve” of blog posts and social network updates, for those days I am not really “feeling it.” No one has to know. ;-)

    • #27 by Dawn on June 20, 2012 - 12:16 pm

      I love this idea! What a great way to exercise your imaginative talents and then, hopefully, transfer to your writing skills. I love, love, love it!

  21. #28 by nicolepyles on June 20, 2012 - 10:56 am

    I am so glad you posted this! I’m working on my own novel and I have been so tempted to just do the whole werewolf thing and cut myself off from the world to complete it. But I haven’t and I am glad I haven’t. Keeping up with everyone is the way to make those sales you want! I am the occasional tweeter, although I am a recovering obsessive tweeter because I can spend some serious time on that site.

    By the way, I like your sunglasses.

  22. #29 by Karma Lee Nash on June 20, 2012 - 11:04 am

    Once again, our truthsayer sayeth truth. And I am guilty. And I want the fangs! I have come and gone in social media three times over the past year. Thankfully, your book, ARE YOU THERE BLOG? has me planning to stay above ground, breathing, and alive!

  23. #30 by KM Huber on June 20, 2012 - 11:19 am

    For me, balance is wrapped round my own authenticity, providing me never-ending exercise.

    For me, WANA methods and Kait Nolan’s ROW80 have proven to be excellent tools in creating an online presence–as an introvert, mine is a preferred, minimal presence–so social media is not such a chore but more of a natural extension of my writing self. What I really like about WANA Tribe is the variety of conversation and array of artists; it is a refreshing site in that there are so many possibilities.

    I recognize that I have the luxury of setting my own pace for social media and writing yet I would have foundered without WANA and ROW80.

    Karen

  24. #31 by annerallen on June 20, 2012 - 11:40 am

    Love the fangs! This is hilarious, but you make such an important point: this is a marathon, not a sprint. Keep in contact with people in a friendly way. Also, it’s important to remember we’re all writers on this bus. Don’t demand that I promote your book because I follow you on Twitter. I’m trying to sell books myself :-)

  25. #32 by Tiffany A White on June 20, 2012 - 11:57 am

    Great post, but I really LOVE the picture!! LOL

  26. #33 by jonnyhatch on June 20, 2012 - 11:58 am

    I think one of the best things that can set someone apart in the world of social media is knowing when not to use it. If your audience can see every move you make, they will leave knowing that they could come back and find anything they’ve missed. If you only provide glimpses, it helps you retain the interest in what you do decide to show the world. Much like how JCPenney has regained interest by cutting out nearly all of their sales — people actually want to pay attention to them again because they are both innovating and creating a buzz around something good.

    • #34 by Author Kristen Lamb on June 20, 2012 - 12:05 pm

      Yes, it is a fine balance for sure. Blogging has the same struggle. How much is too much? But if we only blog once a week, it is really tough to get any traction. So great point. I do feel that absence makes the heart grow fonder :D.

  27. #35 by Amy Denim (@AmyDenim) on June 20, 2012 - 12:06 pm

    Love love loved this post today. I’ve been trying to tell my local RWA chapter they have to actually interact on twitter themselves sometimes! I’m totally sharing this post with all of them. (and lots of them write paranormal, so they will be sucked in by the vampires – oh, umm, no pun intended!)
    Thanks,
    –A

  28. #36 by Dawn on June 20, 2012 - 12:24 pm

    So true, balance is necessary for success. Also, allowing ourselves the time needed to really produce quality work. Just because you can hack out 40,000 words in seven days does NOT make you a great writer. Remembering to be kind to myself in this regard is something I have trouble with – like I don’t already have security issues about the quality of my work or my ability to write something worthwhile….

  29. #37 by Go Jules Go on June 20, 2012 - 2:06 pm

    Ha! This post definitely tickled my zombie funny bone! I’m so glad you brought up the ‘less is more’ / ‘quality over quantity’ point. I’ve been blogging for about a year and a half as a way to start writing again, and gotten fully immersed in the bloggy world as a result (with some Tweeting thrown in). I can’t tell you how torturous it feels when people post minutia multiple times a day and expect you to read it (same goes for my personal Facebook wall). I don’t even know that much about my husband!

    It’s always so nice to come here and get words of wisdom and a support network all at once :)

  30. #38 by katmagendie on June 20, 2012 - 2:28 pm

    You always make me laugh — and then think. Now that’s right dang kewl.

  31. #39 by asraidevin on June 20, 2012 - 2:34 pm

    I’ve been totally sucked into social media of late rather than writing, but that’s partly because none of my plotting or planning or story ideas have been working into something I want to write or something that makes sense. I think I’ve written four different plots in the last month or two, while I worked on edits for my last finished book, so I’m not totally stagnant. But now my laptop wireless fried so I think it’s a sign from the gods that I need to write now.

    This was a kick in the pants I needed.

  32. #40 by Diane Hiller on June 20, 2012 - 2:40 pm

    Kristen, Congratulations on a great site. I have nominated you for a Readers Appreciation Award. Go to my site for more details.

  33. #41 by Lanette Kauten on June 20, 2012 - 2:42 pm

    I’m on FB, WANA, I blog, and I belong to two other online groups besides WANA. So, here’s the question, since I’m staying active in social media, how do I generate traffic to my blog?

  34. #42 by Christina Jean Michaels on June 20, 2012 - 2:56 pm

    Thanks for the laugh! Great post. I’m still trying to figure it all out. Started a blog a few weeks ago, but it’s been a learn-as-I-go experience. Twitter too. I’ve come to the conclusion that stressing too much over the whole social media thing is counterproductive. I think the best thing people can do is to be themselves. Find what works for them, and do some reading online to get ideas/see what others are doing that works.

    Of course, reading your blog is helpful too. :)

  35. #43 by DJ Martin (@herbylady) on June 20, 2012 - 4:09 pm

    I’m on social media probably a total of a half-hour a day (excluding blog). I’m a fast reader, so it’s easy to catch up with everyone I follow on FB, Twitter & G+, and read posts on fora. I pop in & out several times, as a break from my 9-to-5 or writing. I do try to post something on the social media sites at least once a day but there are days I either don’t have time or don’t have anything to say. So far I haven’t seen a problem with that.

    • #44 by Author Kristen Lamb on June 20, 2012 - 4:13 pm

      That’s really all you need. People overcomplicate it…like working out, LOL. We don’t have to be in the gym three hours a day to be healthy.

  36. #45 by Laura Ritchie on June 20, 2012 - 5:08 pm

    I had an eerie feeling when I read this. I wondered, ” How does Kristen DO that? Has she been watching over my shoulder?”

    All or nothing, feast or famine… it gets so easy to slip into that kind of behavior. My Tweeting and FB’ing are sporadic at best. I won’t even tell you how long since I wrote a blog post. Pathetic!

    “Social media takes less than 20 minutes a day…”
    “Give us proof of life. It’s all we ask.”

    I have often wondered what is a reasonable time investment for these things. What you say makes so much sense. Now I have something to shoot for. Can’t thank you enough for the practical advice!

  37. #46 by Tamara LeBlanc on June 20, 2012 - 7:44 pm

    First, I’d like to give a shout out to all my WANA tribe friends on the paranormal forum, Yo, what up!
    Second, hmmm, I feel like a heel. I was undead on the social media circuit for a few months while I finished my WIP. During that time I didn’t Tweet, FB, Pinterest or blog at all, and I barely emailed. I know I told you this already, but after reading this post, I might have at least checked in once a week. Its not like my hands were tied behind my back during my time away. I had use of my typing fingers. I had free time in between the hair pulling, the pacing, the OH MY GOD I SUCK AT WRITING moments. I could have tweeted hi. I should have.
    But I was scared. I was sure that if I poked my toe back into the social media sea, even for a moment, some strange, five headed beast spouting tweets, pin-boards, timelines, pokes, @s and hashtags would slither onto the sand and pull me in. I’d drown under wave after wave of electronic information.
    I needed to reach my goal. I needed to finish that novel. And I did it.
    I neglected my SM friends, my favorite blogs, my emails, but I think that the sacrifice helped me in the long run.
    That being said, however, I feel like Ive learned a measure of control over the past two months. So after I’m done editing the novel, and I’ve gotten up enough courage to submit it, I’ll be able to start the next story in the series without fear. I now have the power and the courage to write fiction daily while still maintaining a healthy, LIVING, SM presence.
    Thank you for reminding me that I have that capability, Kristen. Youre a peach!
    Have a brilliant evening,
    Tamara

    • #47 by Author Kristen Lamb on June 20, 2012 - 7:56 pm

      We did miss you…a lot. We looked on digital milk cartons for you. No calls. No letters. *sniff* But at least you came back to just talk to us and hang out, not sell us something so you are forgiven :D. But don’t do it again or we will totally send the digital bloodhounds to find you.

    • #48 by amyskennedy on June 22, 2012 - 9:08 am

      Yes. This, exactly.

      I’m replying and then going to say “hey!” on twitter… maybe see what’s cooking at WANA int. I feel like Snow White (okay, Snow’s older aunt) being awakened with a smack to the forehead.

  38. #49 by Tamara LeBlanc on June 20, 2012 - 7:45 pm

    P.S. you look fantastic with fangs! :)

  39. #50 by Donna Jean McDunn on June 20, 2012 - 9:31 pm

    I loved this post. I’m just getting started with all this social media stuff and everyday I’ve learned something new about one of the sites. It’s been difficult for me, only because I’m such a chicken. I’m so afraid of sounding stupid or saying something I shouldn’t that I felt frozen for so long. Then I bought your books and studied them. They helped to give me the courage to actually do something. Even though I already had a facebook page, I had never commented on it. I would just go there and read what everyone else wrote. I still have a tough time with Twitter, but I’m slowly getting that too, it’s just been harder. So many abbreviations and stuff I don’t know what they all mean. By the time I do, I’m sure someone will have thought up some new ones. Oh well, always learning, right? My blog is also getting easier. I’ve written several blogs now. I don’t know if they are stupid or not but I’m still proud of how far I’ve come and I owe it all to you and your books. Just wanted to let you know.

  40. #51 by Renée A. Schuls-Jacobson on June 20, 2012 - 10:41 pm

    You a freakin’ hilarious. Hahaha! Bar mitzvah this weekend and then I return from the undead. And we get crackin’ again, right?

  41. #52 by Brian B Baker on June 20, 2012 - 11:05 pm

    I’ve had a Zombie blog for the last few months, but that’s changing. Awesome post. Those vampire teeth in the picture are awesome.

  42. #53 by Daphne Shadows on June 21, 2012 - 12:26 am

    Consistency is key. Also, sleep helps.

  43. #54 by Yvette Carol on June 21, 2012 - 1:22 am

    Kristen I make the mistake of being too alive! I comment too much and spend far far too much time on social media. Please make me stop :-)

  44. #55 by mynightversionpoems on June 21, 2012 - 6:12 am

    Very exciting, interesting and informative post.

  45. #56 by T.M. Mulligan on June 21, 2012 - 7:27 am

    I agree, brief’s are better (brief’s, as in brief blogs – however, there might be a market for “blog briefs” – loungewear for blogging – multiple candy pockets – sewn-in bottle opener and ash tray); you’ve read my blog, am I too verbose? Yee gads, there’s nothing worse than verbosity. I will try your “up to 20 minutes” per blog recommendation – hm, 20 minutes at 120 words per minute = . . .

  46. #57 by Michel King on June 21, 2012 - 12:27 pm

    Oh this is me. I am very much all or nothing and get burned out FAST. However, I am tenacious enough to finish up. I am not a socialite either in media or real life, so I have to plan and dedicate time to log into Twitter and tweet. Nope, it doesn’t happen everyday, but it is just not my thing. I do it because I recognize the need, but not because I like to (I feel the same way about flossing). But, I am turning pale and my teeth are elongating, so I suppose it is time to blog…

  47. #58 by Sky on June 21, 2012 - 2:48 pm

    Love th

  48. #59 by Sky on June 21, 2012 - 2:50 pm

    Love this! It was the word zombie that sucked me in and you kept me here right to the very end it’s actually really motivated me and helpedf feel less guilty about my odd twitter snoops when I should be working ;)

  49. #60 by Laurie Wood on June 21, 2012 - 3:11 pm

    Kristen, I linked to your blog in my blog but have no idea (need to get your book, obviously!) how to show you I did that…sigh, I’ve been out of the game for a bit and need to get back into action…

  50. #61 by babedarla on June 21, 2012 - 4:28 pm

    The disappearing/reappearing is common not only to writers but other artists as well (I know this because I’ve been a designer since 1983, and a self employed costume/fashion designer for the last 26 years)(the writing thing is new-again)When I first got on Facebook, people would absolutely FREAK out when I would get busy and disappear, they thought I had died. Now I’m having “connectivity” problems (i.e., I lost my smartphone with the modem, can’t afford a new one, and there’s just so many hours a day you can sit at Starbucks..) so, now I’m certain all my blog followers think I’ve died or gone vampire, and my blog FRIENDS even more so, now that I’m not commenting on their postings….*sigh*

  51. #62 by Alicia Hall on June 21, 2012 - 5:35 pm

    I am glad you mentioned that your family interrupts you because you aren’t working a real job…right. I have recently felt this way about getting some time alone — an uninterrupted– but they are slowly coming around. Although if someone needs a pair of socks, I’m the only person in the house who can actually find them.

    I struggle with the disappearing act on blog as well. Sometimes life gets overwhelming and I just can’t seem to make it happen. I’m working on getting ahead of myself in blogs so that they will automatically post and I won’t even have to be there.

    As always, thanks for all the good ideas. Gleaning much info from both of your books:) Working on changing my blog right now.

  52. #63 by Karen Rought on June 21, 2012 - 5:55 pm

    There were so many zingers in this one. Love the analogies, Kristen. Thank you!

  53. #64 by James J. Murray, Fiction Writer on June 21, 2012 - 6:26 pm

    Kristen, your blogs always make me smile, and then I realize…I just LEARNED something! You’re so clever and sneaky like that. Great blog, though, about writer habits and SUPER analogies regarding monsters. I’m wondering, though, if those writers just got confused and used the wrong kind of BATH SALTS to relax after a writing marathon. I even wrote about that on a past blog. Here’s the link. http://wp.me/p2knuT-2N

  54. #65 by Nikki Barnabee/@GargoylePhan on June 21, 2012 - 7:52 pm

    I love this post! When you bring vampires and werewolves and zombies into any discussion, you have my attention. And when you’re hilarious like this, I’m really loving it!

    I’m not a zombie blogger, at least not recently since I’ve been blogging regularly, but I’m somewhat zombiefied otherwise, since I get about 10 minutes sleep per week and thus shuffle about, red-eyed and oblivious to the world around me. I do not eat brains, being a vegetarian, but I have been known to relentlessly follow after anyone who smells of chocolate. Of course, who doesn’t?

    I balance my life between being the recluse writer I always wanted to grow up to be and the social butterfly who lives on Twitter. It’s amazing to have human companionship available at 3 in the morning when you’re feeling chatty. Life is never lonely when so many Twitfriends are right there on your computer screen. And yes, I overdo it. I really live there when I’m not writing. If I could inject my consciousness directly into it, I just might. ;-}

    As for my use of social media (in my case, mainly Twitter), I’ve worked for several years to build a platform of tweeps whose work I admire & company I enjoy, but I’m still baffled when my blog posts or short story links get 3 RTs but my tweets like “Had pizza tonight. Yum.” get 47 RTs. It’s a weird TwitWorld out there. ;-D

  55. #66 by Mary O'Gara on June 21, 2012 - 8:55 pm

    So THAT’S why my hair’s so long. I’ll confess. I get caught up in writing or other silly things and suddenly realize I need a blog fix. Binge and catch up. I’ll do better, Kristen, and thanks for the warning about bad hair days. Those of us who are descended from executed American witches do need a little help from time to time.

  56. #67 by Sonia G Medeiros on June 23, 2012 - 12:21 am

    Lately, I’ve felt like the Twitter undead LOL. I haven’t been on as much as I’d like but I do try to stop in and say hello. Hopefully, it’s striking a fairly decent balance until I can get more in the social swing of things.

    Love your totally true hilarious stories. :D

  57. #68 by Melissa Maygrove on June 27, 2012 - 8:11 am

    I try to keep a consistent ‘net presence, and I blog twice a week with a grammar series on Mondays and random topics/guests on Wednesdays. I do waver on the scheduled tweets issue, however. The problem with Twitter is the varied size of followings from one Tweep to another. What looks like spam in a small feed gets lost in a big one.

    I follow hundreds. If people don’t repeat themselves or @mention me, I miss their tweets. Thanks to Hootsuite, I was able to create a smaller feed of close friends & colleagues–that helps–and I do try to mix it up with replies and re-tweets so I’m not always self-promoting. *shrugs* I’m gaining 75-100 new followers a week now without even trying. I guess I’m doing something right.

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