Much of any kind of success is related to attitude. We can’t control the weather, the future of publishing, the global economic conditions, but we can control our attitude. To be successful at anything, there are a few core principles we should embrace and work on every day. These are muscles of character.
We have peace, joy, patience, self-discipline. Those things are already inside of us. However, we must choose to work on them and do our part to strengthen these “character muscles” to enjoy their benefits.
Ignore Happiness and Strive for Joy
I don’t care for the word “happy” or “happiness” because it’s tethered to other words like “happening” and “happenstance.” Happiness is one of those things that’s easy dictated by what is happening. Joy, however, is a constant and something we can choose.
If you’ve been writing any length of time, you know there can be some dark times. Negative people, poor results, rejection, failure, setbacks, etc. I’ve written works so complicated I needed a team of sherpas to find my original idea (and my own butt).
It’s easy to be miserable when life or our art isn’t cooperating. It’s hard to choose to remain peaceful and continue pressing with a positive attitude. Yet, the more we exercise peace, joy and self-discipline, the stronger they become, and *sigh* resistance is what makes them grow. Resistance can be a good thing if we remember to keep it in a positive perspective.
Okay, this book turned out to be a mess, but can I fix it? Can I learn from it?
Keep going. This is why it’s always so crucial to keep moving. If we stand too long and fixate on things we can’t control, we can become paralyzed and end up doing nothing at all.
I’ve talked about this before, but many lessons bear repeating. Feelings are great. They are useful, but they are liars and self-centered. Feelings can be affected by weather, hormones, stress, a washing machine that’s broken down (TWO TIMES NOW), lack of sleep, allergies, and on and on. If we wait until we feel like doing something, we’re setting ourselves up to live life strapped to Hell’s Tilt-A-Whirl.
As writers, we like to talk about “being visited by our muse” but the tough reality is the muse is about as reliable as a Russian compact car. Sure, enjoy it when she comes and hangs out, but the muse is flaky and prone to see something shiny and disappear for days or weeks. “Science” shows that one way to catch our muse is to ignore her. Muses are related to cats and few things make the muse want to shower love like when we sit at a keyboard working without her.
Just ignore the glitter she leaves in your keyboard.
Life Doesn’t Stop for Dreams
Discernment is another area all of us should seek to grow. It’s easy to go to extremes. I’m guilty. I work until I am half-dead, then need a week to recover. That is just dumb. Hey, I’m getting better. The truly tough part about discernment is it’s related to maturity, meaning we can only gain either by making a LOT of mistakes and doing a lot of things wrong. We learn to be balanced by getting a taste of being unbalanced.
If we aren’t failing, then we aren’t doing anything interesting.
And, at this rate, my life is truly FASCINATING😀.
Life goes on even when we write. Kids get sick, spouses lose jobs, taxes have to be paid, and on an on and on. There is only one right time to begin writing. NOW. Even if it’s just a little bit. It’s good for us to at least start. “Starting” helps us develop intuition and know when feelings are just messing with us.
As an example, I worked out almost every day through my pregnancy with The Spawn. And I will preface this with telling you that I was not a disciplined person AT ALL at the time. I did most things when I was in the “mood.” So I made myself a promise when I got pregnant that I would go to the gym and walk five minutes on the treadmill. If, after five minutes, I still felt miserable, it was okay to quit.
In ten months of being pregnant, I only quit a handful of times. Most of the time, the getting going was enough to burn away the “feelings” and then I felt BETTER for having set foot in the gym.
Writing can be the same. Just vow to write a few words or read so many chapters of a critical book (craft, research, fiction, etc.). Baby steps are steps and they add up and, over time, develop the character of a professional.
I know when I was new I loooooved excuses. I still make them, though not as often. The night before last, we had yet another ice storm. And yes, the Yankees all laugh, but I don’t own any warm clothes. You can’t buy them here. Texans are unaccustomed to cold and don’t think of things the same way as people used to wintery weather.
Anyway, it was time for bed and I went to let Pippa out for one last bathroom break. I knew the lower steps had iced, but because of the shadows and icy fog, I was unaware the top of the porch had iced as well. When I turned to let her inside, both feet flew out from under me in cartoonish fashion and I landed, quite literally on my head. Thankfully this is the toughest part of my body.
Anyway, the point of this is I have learned (to be more careful in ice). But yesterday I rested. I couldn’t move my head and felt like I’d been beaten. But there was a time I would have just kept on going like some idiotic Energizer Bunny. There was also a time, I would have taken a hard bump on the noggin and then taken off two weeks because my neck hurt. Whiiiineee.
It’s that whole discernment thing.
Yes, today I’m sore. My neck and back are stiff, but life continues. The house needed to be cleaned and the blog needed to be written and I still have work to do. And I am certain my future will have all kinds of challenges (so will yours), but the point is that, if we wait for a challenge-free-life to begin writing or to continue writing, we’ll be writing from the afterlife.
You could also be writing from the afterlife if you are dumb enough not to look for ICE.
But the lesson here is people who’ve been hit in the head make better bloggers…
Wait, that wasn’t my point. Well, I’ve forgotten it. The key thing to remember is the largest part of winning is simply showing up. We will always find excuses. Excuses are easy, but costly. Choose to focus on what we can control. Choose to have joy. Choose to be peaceful despite the storms, because storms will always be there. Step a foot out. Getting started is often most of the battle.
What are your thoughts? Do you struggle with making excuses? Hey, we are human, we all do. What ways do you help keep yourself accountable? Do you make excuses because your tendency is to put others ahead of yourself? Are you afraid of failure or even success? Do you beat yourself up over baby steps and forget that they DO count?
Make sure to check the announcements below, because WANA has put together some seriously cool FREE stuff to help you in your writing journey.
I love hearing from you!
To prove it and show my love, for the month of February, everyone who leaves a comment I will put your name in a hat. If you comment and link back to my blog on your blog, you get your name in the hat twice. What do you win? The unvarnished truth from yours truly. I will pick a winner once a month and it will be a critique of the first 20 pages of your novel, or your query letter, or your synopsis (5 pages or less).
ANNOUNCEMENTS, AGENTS & FREE STUFF:
Thinking about attending #WANACon or already signed up?
TONIGHT check out a FREE presentation by one of WANACon’s presenters, Gabriela Pereira, on: “How to Get the Most Out of A Conference.”
– To join the presentation, go to WANA International’s site at 8PM Eastern (New York) time / 5pm Pacific (Seattle) time.
– On the right sidebar, select “WANACon Open House – Feb 12, 2014″ from the drop-down box under “Conference Hall A”.
– Enter your name and the password “welcome”, and then click “Join.”
Click here to ADD THIS EVENT to your Google calendar.
The Open House starts one hour earlier if you want to work out tech gremlins, check out the classroom, or visit with others.
Join us at WANACon (THE global virtual writing conference) on February 21 & 22, use promo code “Valentine” for $15 off the registration fee this week. Three agents covering almost every fiction category are also taking pitches in private, virtual, webcam & audio-capable meeting rooms.
And if you sign up, REMEMBER to enter the Rafflecopter this week for your chance to win a refund of your conference registration fee!